


Babies Come From...Duffle Bags??

by Red Charade (traciller)



Series: Flash Tumblr Ficlets [36]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Meeting the Family, Misunderstandings, domestic!Coldflash, kids being ridiculous, silliness, slightly drunk Len
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-08
Updated: 2016-04-08
Packaged: 2018-06-01 01:24:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6495334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/traciller/pseuds/Red%20Charade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Barry and Len are away visiting extended family of Barry’s (really the Wests) and Len is maybe sliiiiightly drunk. He comes out onto the porch and sees....a bag hanging from the porch railing...with a child in it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Babies Come From...Duffle Bags??

**Author's Note:**

> Based on this Tumblr post: http://spiritdick.tumblr.com/post/93107921192/i-want-to-know-why
> 
> Yes, I'm aware that isn't a duffle bag. :p

Barry and Len are away visiting extended family of Barry’s (really the Wests) and Len is maybe sliiiiightly drunk. He comes out onto the porch and sees....a bag hanging from the porch railing...with a child in it.

He looks at the kid.

The kid smiles up at him widely.

Len stares for a moment. Looks down at his beer in hand. Looks back at the kid.

The kid is still smiling.

“Are you up there like that because you want to be?” Len asks.

“Yep!” the kid replies.

“…Why?”

“It’s fun!”

(this got long, sorry)

“Oh…” Len is pretty sure that is neither an excuse nor an explanation. But, well, kids. “Do any other adults know you’re like this?”

“Yep!”

“Oh…” Len repeats, turning and heading back into the house.

“Barry! Is it like a family tradition to have kids hanging off of the porch in bags?” Len supposes he could’ve worded that better.

“ _What_?!” Barry asks, coming out of the kitchen with his aunt and an adult cousin Len can’t remember the name of at the moment.

Yep, he could’ve worded that better.

“One of the kids, he’s outside stuffed in a bag and hanging on the porch. He says adults know he’s like that,” Len supposes that sounds even worse and maybe he is a little bit more drunk than he thought.

Picking up that first beer when he was already nervous was probably not the best of ideas. But, it’s just beer! It’s not like he’s carrying around a whiskey bottle.

“Let me see…” Barry looks skeptical and Len is slightly offended. Why would he make that up??

He and a few other people follow Barry out onto the porch.

There is no child in a bag hanging from the porch. There is a bag, the same one Len remembers, but it’s empty and abandoned on the porch floor.

Barry picks it up and looks over at Len.

“I swear there was a kid in that bag hanging from the porch five seconds ago,” Len insists.

Barry walks over and gives Len a soft kiss on the lips…and then takes his beer away from him, “I think you’ve had enough, honey.”

“What? No, I really did see a kid in that bag and they were hanging on the porch!” He wasn’t protesting the confiscation of his beer, he didn’t care about that. But, he was not drunk enough to hallucinate! He’d never been that drunk in his life.

“Okay, Len, but let’s just go inside and I’ll get you a glass of water while we wait for the coffee,” Barry said, putting an arm around Len’s waist and guiding him back into the house.

Len went willingly and easily, but not quietly.

“I wasn’t hallucinating. I really saw a little kid in that bag hanging from the porch. He smiled up at me and told me adults knew all about it,” Len insisted as he was guided to the kitchen and pressed into a chair.

A tall glass of water was in front of him in a few seconds.

“Drink that,” Barry ordered.

Len frowned at it, not much liking being told what to do in such terms, but he took the glass and started to drink it. Mostly sipping, but not at a dawdling pace. He knew what this was for.

“I did,” Len insisted again, hearing a bit of a sulk in his own voice as he watched Barry start to get things ready to make coffee over at the counter.

The back door was open, but the screen door was shut and suddenly it banged as a kid ran in with no consideration to the poor door. It caught Len’s attention, since it was loud and basically right next to him, and his eyes widened when he looked at the kid.

“That’s him! That’s the kid that was in the bag!” Len insisted, gesturing with his hand in the child’s direction.

Barry turned to look at the kid, sizing him up. Yes! See! He was totally small enough to fit in that bag! Finally, he would be vindicated!

“Warren, is that true? Did you let someone put you in a bag and then hang the bag on the porch with you still in it?” Barry asked, although Len could tell that his boyfriend felt stupid even asking.

The kid, Warren, widened his eyes innocently (too innocently, if you asked Len), “no, Barry. Why would I do that?”

Len literally, and quite audibly, gasped (okay, he was definitely drunker than he thought he was) because that little brat was lying!

“Okay, sorry for the weird question, Warren,” Barry said, turning around when the coffee machine made a beeping sound of some sort.

Warren ran through the kitchen toward the door that led to the living room.

“Walk in the house, Warren. And take off your shoes!” Barry reminded and Len was pretty sure that the tone he used was what people called a Mom voice.

Warren gave a loud, childish sigh and went back over to the door and took his shoes off and set them outside neatly next the door in case there was mud. Plus, this was the kitchen and the last thing anyone needed was to trip over shoes in the kitchen.

Len watched the whole thing and also watched Warren trudge back across the kitchen in socks before a cup of coffee was set in front of him. Black.

Len frowned at it.

“Drink,” Barry insisted, tapping the table next to it with a finger. “And no more talk about kids hanging from things.”

Len winced, because yeah…definitely could’ve worded that better. Alright, so Barry had been right to take his beer away from him and try to sober him up a bit. But, he had _not_ been hallucinating! He picked up the cup and took a sip of it as Barry turned around to clean up at the counter.

Len turned to look in the direction of the kitchen doorway into the living room. Just as Warren was about to disappear into it, he turned back and gave Len a wicked grin, and then he was gone. Disappeared into the living room.

Len took another sip of his coffee. At least the kid was okay, even if he was clearly a little brat. Still, he wasn’t looking forward to the lecture he was probably going to get from his boyfriend later about this being the first impression he makes on Barry’s extended family.


End file.
